Tuesday, December 1, 2009

...Old People in Grocery Stores

"This yogurt, it helps my husband? He eats da grease!"

A hunched old woman with some sort of Russian accent approaches me while I carefully decide what flavors of Lite n' Fit I want to buy for just 39 cents each. Wearing a long grey dress and a draping black coat spotted with cat hair, the old woman standing just under five feet tall uses both hands to hold up a green six-pack of Activia for me to see.

"He is the fat!" She points at his belly. "He eats entire package? It helps with da acid?"

"No," I reply. "Tell him to eat one every night after dinner. He will feel better after that."

It wasn't entirely true, but I wasn't about to explain Prilosec OTC to this woman who was ready to feed her husband six cups of yogurt when they got home. I see her husband a few feet behind her. A large man with a grey beard wearing overalls and brown work boots. He picks up a tub of sour cream and studies the package like he's never seen it before.

"Oh," she looks down at the Activia. "Ok I buy this!" She walks away and begins to loudly state something to her husband, in her language. I can tell she wears the pants in the family. As his wife hurries over to the discounted grocery shelf, the old man puts the yogurt in their cart a with a look on his face as if he is saying, "Why can't I just take a Prilosec?"

Do old people ever approach you in grocery stores? I have plenty more stories where this one comes from. Let me know if you want to hear more.


  1. Sure, more stories please, and yes old people and young and those of all ages seem to approach me, not sure why, maybe I seem approachable as I'm thinking you do as well?